Robert H. Carpenter
Robert Halford Carpenter, born April 30, 1971, passed away unexpectedly this past June. Rob, as he was known to friends, was born in Rota, Spain, where his family, parents Robert Alphonse Carpenter (July 23, 1941-February 2, 2021) and Carol Lee Carpenter (August 8, 1942-August 3, 2019) and older sister Anne resided during Bob’s tour of duty there. Rob had spent half his life overseas, with years in Japan and London, England, as well as Spain, when that life was rounded out with a coming of age in Virginia (Arlington and Norfolk). With a degree in History from the University of Virginia, he settled into an adult life of contentment, small pleasures, great conversation, and friendship after a year bartending in London and a jaunt out west.
He found meaningful work in international development with stretches at the Freedom Forum, Chemonics and spent many years consulting with international firms bringing aid overseas. His friends held him dear and he was known for his ability to hold space for them, his knack for listening deeply, his wry humor and his extraordinary culinary skills. Skills which were honed during long family meals and with the collaboration of his mother. He was a loving son who cared for his parents in their “dotage” as his father would have said, along with his sister, Anne. He was a loyal brother. Forever Tito to his sister, his large extended family and navy “family”, and the friends and colleagues who shared meals and holidays and good times, his tilted head, his wry smile, his humor, care and gentleness will be missed. He was gifted a thinker, writer, and conversationalist, a perceptive person and a loving soul. He is survived by his sister, and extended family (Aunts Gail, Kathy and Terese and many many cousins). A memorial service will be held in his honor this coming September.
Please reach out to Annie with stories memories or photos at: dearannelee@gmail.com
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Anne, I am so very sorry to hear this news! Sending you my deepest sympathies and a gigantic hug.
You were my fellow Adams Morganer and fellow ex-Chemonics. A good friend and drinking buddy. We talked about the consulting new biz world, cooking and politics and family. Your absence hard to swallow. Miss you my friend. Great human being. Hope our spirits meet one day !!
Rob and I met at the Middle East Institute back in the late 90s. I was spending a semester in Washington finishing my BA degree at American, though I was an Occidental student in CA. We were both taking Arabic and attending some of the lectures at MEI (the Middle East was a specialty for both of us). Back then, I was so amazed to see non-Arabs taking an interest in the Middle East and trying to learn Arabic. Here I was, an Egyptian with elementary Arabic language skills, and I wanted deeper knowledge not just for myself and my heritage but also for my intended work in the field of disaster relief and diplomacy. Rob and I became fast friends, and though I had to leave when that semester ended, I was back after graduation to begin work and continue with Arabic. Rob was my closest friend at the time and my beloved epicurean buddy – we picked a different restaurant to check out almost every week, or we cooked at my place and tested our culinary skills. One time, we bought soft-shell crabs and made them ourselves – hehehe…we felt so accomplished and proud of ourselves that day.
After a few short months, I returned to California, where I got a job in disaster relief and the usual non-profit humanitarian grind of 80-hour weeks. Rob, too, was working extremely hard; both of us were in desperate need of a vacation. Rob and I were talking on the phone one day when he told me he won two round-trip airline tickets to anywhere Delta flies, and he offered me a ticket to recalibrate after being burnt out. I was stunned by his kindness and generosity. How did we have such good luck? We chose to go to Rio, Brazil, for a week to see the sights and relax. On that trip, I learned Rob was scared of heights, so some of the adventures I was looking forward to went by the wayside. He learned I was a morning person and didn’t have the desire to spend nights at bars. We discovered for the first time that there is more to life than Arabic and fine dining. I laugh about it now, and wouldn’t have changed a thing; I am so thankful I have those memories.
We remained friends, and whenever I came to DC, Rob always offered me a place to stay and at least one night out. I can’t imagine my life without Rob; I keep going over all of it in my head every day. I hope he is at peace and looking down on all of us, seeing how loved he is.
Love you, Rob. Anne, if there is anything I can do, please don’t hesitate to contact me.